id be glad to
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Hello my rib-scented angel!
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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