i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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