Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
no. you can't hotbox the world.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
