when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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