he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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