I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Randomize
