found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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