i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
