Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
