You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement 😭😂
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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