i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
