You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize
