...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
