okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
