I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
She said her name was "party"
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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