I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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