I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
