he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
