last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
This gyro tastes like lonliness
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
