You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
So vagazzling was a success
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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