Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
