i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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