am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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