I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
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