Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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