remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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