ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
