Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
