I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
