she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
