During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
