He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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