I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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