We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Randomize
