i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
this beer tastes like vomit already
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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