Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize