Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
