sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
a search helicopter?!
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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