We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
