you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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