I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
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