Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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