Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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