whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize