saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize