Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
