i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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