"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
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