why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
