sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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